Patsy Stone on Politics

HUGE royals news!

2007-04-14T23:06:00.000-06:00

Patsy is completely gobsmacked at news that Prince William and Kate Middleton have broken up. (www.dailymail.co.uk www.thesun.co.uk etc...) Am shocked! Shocked, I tell you! I really thought she'd have made a good princess....

Patsy returns to London - take two

2007-04-08T13:22:00.000-06:00

Tuesday morning of my trip, Kristine and I set out from Goodenough College in leafy Bloomsbury in an attempt to catch a glimpse of Her Maj (that's Her Majesty Elizabeth II, not Her Madge, as in Mrs. Richie) arriving at Westminster Abbey for a service to commemorate the 200th anniversary of the British Parliament passing an Act to abolish the slave trade. (For more information on that topic, see the fabulous new movie "Amazing Grace" starring Welsh actor Ioan Gruffudd.)

As luck would have it, Kristine and I arrived on time to snap up a patch of concrete directly across the street from the entrance to the Abbey, mingling with TV and print journalists with big cameras and anti-glorification-of-Empire protestors (who I assume were protesting what they considered an overly white-focused celebration of the abolitionist movement in Britain. See also "Amazing Grace"... the abolition movement in Britain at the time was composed of, among many other "ordinary folk", a number of wealthy white aristos with a conscience. See William Wilberforce et al.) But I digress. I had my camera ready to snap of photo of Her Majesty arriving, when Kristine said out of the blue, "oh look, there's Tony Blair." My knees went all wobbly at the sight of celebrity when I looked up and spotted Tony and Cherie walking towards the Abbey for the service. I raised my camera lens, snapped... and then the bloody truck drove by. S***. Damn. Grr. A stupid lorry ruined my shot - see above. I snapped again and got T & C, albeit from a distance, entering the church. See photo. Cherie's wearing the grey hat; Tony is man in black next to hat-speck. Sigh.

I was determined not to let this happen when the Queen arrived. Kristine first spotted the Royal Daimler, Royal Standard flying above the car. I began snapping. More snaps. Finally the Queen and Prince Philip got out of the car. It actually took me a split second to realize that the small figure in the grey dress coat was actually the Queen. Delayed reaction. Knees still wobbly. I did, in the end, get a few snaps (see above) and all was well. The service began, and Kristine and I walked back up towards Leicester Square to grab lunch at a pub. Little did we know that during the service a prostestor, mere feet from The Queen, would create a melee. (More on that in the Times, Guardian, etc, etc.)

After lunch, Kristine headed back to her conference and I went to the National Portrait Gallery in search of Anne Boleyn. Like seeing the Mona Lisa for the first time, I was quite excited to stand in front of Queen Anne's famous portrait. (See above.) As I expected, the Gallery was all I'd ever hoped it to be. My timing was terrfic and I also got to see an exhibit of fashion photography featuring the likes of Kate Moss, etc. Enjoyed my visit immensely and picked up a few souvenirs in the gift shop. You can actually print off copies of works held in the Gallery through a computer console in the shop -- I picked up two: the famous Anne portrait, and an early portrait of Diana done by the artist Bryan Organ. It was painted just after her marriage, I think, and it brings me back to a time, I imagine, of innocence, before the world knew the truth about the whole shebang. She's little more than just-out-of-girlhood and it captivated me in a way that's hard to explain.

After walking around some more, navigating the massive crowds on Oxford Street near all the large shops (Topshop was an absolute zoo and I left, feeling claustorphobic, after a few minutes.), I went back to meet Kristine. That night we took in a movie: Becoming Jane, starring Anne Hathaway, about how Jane Austen came to be Jane Austen. Worth seeing.

Wednesday morning I took the train from Waterloo station out to Hampton Court Palace, originally built by Henry VIII's Cardinal Wolsey. Hampton Court was awesome, especially because it's out of London, and thus, it's easier to imagine it being 400 years previous, because there's no modern buildings that surround it, and cars whizzing by, like at the Tower of London, per se. It was terrific to "step back in time" and I tried to take it all in. I definitely recommend the 30 minutes train ride out to see this palace; so glad I did. Especially enjoyed the costumed tour guide, dressed in Tudor outfit, acting in character as the ill-fated Catherine Howard, fifth wife, second executed, of lecherous Henry. (Speaking of Henry, I can't wait to get my hands on a DVD copy of Showtime's new series about Henry and his ladies, "The Tudors". Pity it'll probably take a year, unless CBC agrees to snap up the rights to the show, which I think was co-produced by a Canadian.)

Wednesday afternoon I went back into the city and toured Westminster Abbey again, like I did in 1997. It's hard to imagine standing next to Elizabeth I's grave, but I did, and again, tried to take it all in. One of the reasons I love London, and England, so much, is the proximity to history, to the great men and women of the past. Few other places like the Abbey can give you that feeling.

At that point, Kristine joined me and we hit the shops: Harrods, Harvey Nicks, etc, etc. It was a longg, but good day. We stopped at the shop for snacks and then settled in to watch a few deliciously trashy episodes of Footballers Wives. All hail Jason and Tanya!

Thursday morning was my last few remaining hours in London, so Kristine and I headed off to see St. Paul's Cathedral and walk around a bit. Got a few good pics of both of us standing on the Millennium Bridge. Managed to work our way back up to Goodenough, where I grabbed my bag and feverishly headed off to Euston Station to catch my train up to Manchester to see April & Mark. More on that portion of the journey later.

Patsy Returns to Motherland!

2007-04-04T19:10:00.000-06:00

My fabulous England trip has come and gone; a wonderful time was had by all. And by all, I mean just me. I arrived in London at 10:00 on Sunday morning, March 25. My friend Gerald was flying in from Toronto, so he met me at Heathrow and we took the Tube into the city together. We parted at Hammersmith station, him to his hotel, me to Goodenough College to meet up with my bosom buddy and all-around-Passy-partner-in-crime Kristine. (she's the flame-haired one in the photos) Spent the rest of Sunday walking around and exploring - Leceister Square, The Mall, took a zillion photos outside Buckingham Palace, etc, etc. In the evening we took in a show at Royal Albert Hall in a private box courtesy of the college.

Monday morning Kristine had to attend a conference, so I headed out for the Tower of London. I had previously been in 1997, but wanted to go again. It was well worth it and I spent a little extra time standing in front of the spot where Anne Boleyn was executed in 1536. She's one of my favourite historical figures, and if you don't know much about her, I suggest you brush off an English history text. Specifically, in the last few years there's been some great historical research that's taken a second look at Anne from a feminist perspective. Long story short - she wasn't a whore and was very likely completely innocent of all the charges Henry put forth against her. (See Retha Warnicke, Antonia Fraser, et al.)

After the Tower I took the Tube to the Victoria & Albert Museum to do a quick run through and to scoop up an exhibition poster of the Kylie! exhibit. http://www.vam.ac.uk/exhibitions/future_exhibs/kylie/

I was on a mission to score some great poster art for my office walls and Ms. Minogue did not disappoint. After the museum gift shop I walked from the museum up towards the Albert Hall and walked through Kensington Gardens on my way to see the Mario Testino exhibit of his Diana portraits at KP. On my last trip to London in 1997 before Diana's death I spent several minutes gazing through the locked gates wondering if Diana was inside the palace somewhere. This time, the gates were wide open and I walked up to the palace and around the side to enter in for the tour.

Enjoyed the exhibit and toured through the old apartments of Princess Margaret. By this time I was quite tired, so headed back to Goodenough. Needed a quick catnap to recharge the batteries for the evening's event: seeing Daniel Radcliffe (aka: Harry Potter) in a production of Peter Shaffer's Equus. Daniel was fabulous, as was Richard Griffiths, who played the co-lead in the play. (FYI -- Griffiths, a hugely talented stage actor, played Uncle Vernon in the Potter movies) The tickets were worth every penny, and I'm not referring to Daniel being fully naked on stage either. At the end of the performance during the applause portion, he looked so amazed that he was up on there on the stage just having done such a demanding performance. I felt almost proud for him, which sounds strange, but I just felt really really happy for him. I bet he's pleased to be praised for something other than Harry.

Anyways, more on the trip later -- I'm off to re-watch a few episodes of my latest Brit TV favourites - thanks April & Mark for introducing me to Ricky Gervais' Extras and Mitchell & Webb's "Peep Show". Bloody hilarious - I ran out to HMV as soon as I got home and bought them.

Check back in a bit folks for more London tales... highlights include sightings of the Queen and Tony Blair, and a trip to see Manchester United play at Old Trafford. (Thanks Mr. Jones!)

Smyth's Gone... Messier Jersey Retired...

2007-02-27T20:12:00.000-07:00

It has not been a good few hours, dear reader. The last time Patsy cried this much was when the liquor store across the street ran out of Bolly....

Today was a pretty good day, but it went downhill fast when MWR uttered those awful six little words: "did you hear about Ryan Smyth?"

When my pal Haley mentioned that she'd heard a rumour about the Oilers possibly trading Ryan Smyth a few days ago, I dismissed it out of hand. The Oilers would never trade Smytty, the heart and soul of the Oilers for more than a decade. They just wouldn't. Well they did. And I cried. And cried some more.

And on the day that Mark Messier's jersey was raised too. Mess will always be my favourite player of all time, but Ryan's a close second. I would have been emotional just watching them raise that Number 11 jersey tonight, but considering the trade news, there were a whole hell of a lot more tears. This sucks.

FYI - for a good Oilers blog, check out: http://coveredinoil.blogspot.com

I think this calls for a Long Island Iced Tea...and considering that Ryan's headed for Long Island, I guess that's a pretty good choice. Oh the irony.

Bloggin' Oscars...

2007-02-25T19:26:00.000-07:00

1) 7:25 p.m. MT -- Not another bloody dance number... come on! Does ANYONE enjoy these? I know cutting them would mean putting Debbie Allen out of a job, but it would at least trim 15-20 mins from the show...

2) Terrific surprise having Alan Arkin win for Best Supporting Actor. I enjoyed "Little Miss Sunshine" the most of any movie this year, and am pleased to see Arkin get the award. If you haven't seen it yet, go... his crotchety grandpa is awesome!

3) Loved Rachel Weisz's dress...

Bloggin' Oscars

2007-02-25T18:16:00.000-07:00

Dresses... what do I love so far? My fave (as of 6:15 MT) is Emily Blunt in a beautiful sapphire blue, sequined dress. Gorgeous! Nicole Kidman - that woman is TALL! in a red column. Helen Mirren is stunning as always. Cate Blanchett (my favourite actress ever) is always flawless. Jada Pinkett Smith's gold dress is beautiful against her dark skin...

More later.

5 things you didn't know about Patsy

2006-12-19T18:32:00.000-07:00

I'm it! (been tagged by Leona -- http://flackadelic.typepad.com -- that is.) So without further ado, here are 5 things you didn't know about Patsy.

1) Much to my mother's dismay, I once cut off all the blue hair from my My Little Pony doll.

2) I'm an Anglophile, but don't drink tea.

3) I think Marc Jacobs (www.marcjacobs.com) is overrated. (gasp! Sorry fellow fashionistas)

4) I've never been to New Brunswick.

5) When I was little and my parents would go out to a party, my sister and I would make icing and eat it straight out of the bowl. (Yum)

Patsy Stone Goes to Washington

2006-12-09T18:22:00.000-07:00

Greetings possums! As promised, this post will be about all things Washington. Patsy spent November 30-December 3 in the political junkie's mecca that is D.C. The purpose of my trip was work-related, but I managed to spend the weekend sightseeing as well.

I had a fantastic trip and enjoyed meeting my American colleagues, who were even funnier and friendlier than I had hoped.

The highlights of the trip were seeing so many familiar sights: Arlington National Cemetery, the Lincoln Memorial, the Vietnam War Memorial, the World War II Memorial, Washington Monument, Capitol building, White House, etc.

I also visited the National Archives to see, behind glass, the Declaration of Independence, U.S. Constitution and Bill of Rights, and one of the Smithsonian museums, the National Portrait Gallery.

Three favourite portraits of mine were one of Senator Hillary Clinton, opera soprano Denyce Graves (I actually saw her sing in Edmonton about 10 years ago when I had no idea how famous she would become, at least in the opera world), and Nobel Prize winning author Toni Morrison.

The Toni Morrison portrait was probably the most awe-inspiring; I entered a side room off one of the main corridors, and was looking at another portrait when I turned and almost jumped back at catching my first glance at the Morrison portrait: it was so unbelievably lifelike, she practically jumped off the canvas, it was like she was standing right next to me. It was eery, but awe-inspiring, I didn't want to look away.

I also explored the famous Georgetown neighbourhood on Sunday afternoon, people watching and making a trip to Sephora. (Oh, how Patsy has missed Sephora since she left Toronto!) Georgetown is trendiness at its maximum, filled with fancy boutiques (Kate Spade, Barneys, etc.) and it was also my first foray into the world of Dean and Deluca. (yuppy, high-end "grocery" store, in the vein of Whole Foods, I suppose, though even more pretentious!)

I did a tremendous amount of walking, and my poor feet were just killing me by the end of the trip, but I had a wonderful time. I've attached a few select photos for your viewing pleasure.

And, of course, I couldn't help doing a little shopping; visiting Filene's Basement (a U.S. version of Winners, in a sense) and found a hot-pink Coach wallet and Furla evening bag on sale! I couldn't leave them in their glass case, (April J. wouldn't have been able to forgive me!), so I brought them back to Canada with me.

Patsy out.

Patsy Stone to Take D.C.!

2006-11-09T22:46:00.000-07:00

Just a few quick items before I head off to bed:

1) U.S. midterm elections -- woo hoo! Dems take back the House AND Senate (better late than never). Speaker Nancy Pelosi is the first woman to hold this position and will soon be 3rd in line of precedence. We're 2 heartbeats away from having the first woman president! It's nice to see some positive news on the U.S. political horizon. A more in-depth post on that over the weekend.

2) Patsy's off to visit the capital of the free world (America bashers: insert eye roll here), Washington, D.C., at the end of the month. Can't wait to see all the sights (White House, Arlington National Cemetery, Vietnam War Memorial, Abe Lincoln statue, etc, etc.) and meet some work colleagues. I'll make sure to take lots of pics, although since I'm going by myself I guess I won't be in any of them. Maybe I can find a Senator and ask him/her to take one of me in front of a famous building.

2a) I will be visiting Neiman Marcus while I'm there. (or "needlessly marked-up" as my Chicago pal Maureen calls it)

3) As you all know, Thursday is terrific TV night: Ugly Betty and The Office. Fabulously funny new episodes from both shows. For the second week in a row, UB made me tear up (Wilhemina does have a heart after all!) and The Office continues to make me thank Goddess daily for the comedic genius that is Steve Carell.

Speaking of The Office, I want to do a shoutout to a fantastic fansite about the show: www.lifeintheoffice.com. I'm on the site's mailing list, so everytime there's a new post I check it out. If you're a fan of the show, give it a try. It'll be a new favourite.

4) I've been silent on the recent Belinda Stronach bashing that's been going on in the public arena lately, but have decided to air my views on the matter. As you know from reading previous posts, I'm no Belinda fan, but am going to stick up for her now (not that she needs a knight-in-shining armour).

Enough of the sexist jokes and gripes, please! No more name calling or tasteless sexual references. Let's just stick to the politics and issues and leave clothing and what may or may not have gone on in the bedroom off the front pages. It's none of our damned business.

I'd like to posit what I think is really going on here. In simple terms, Belinda's rich, attractive, successful and powerful -- and that's why these old backroom boys who don't like women in positions of power/authority keep picking on her.

On another note, I also think it's juvenile to comment on Rona Ambrose's hair. Disagree with her handling of the Environment ministry, or the U.N. environment conference, but keep her luscious locks out of it. When was the last time you noticed anyone commenting on Bill Graham's tie or Stephen Harper's shoes?

5) I've finally seen both "Marie Antoinette" and "The Queen", and I want to see "Babel" and "Stranger than Fiction", so perhaps I'll do a quadruple movie review over the next few days.

6) Last, but certainly not least, I want to encourage everyone to take a moment or two on Saturday to remember on Remembrance Day. Call your grandfather or grandmother. Hug a veteran wearing a poppy.

I'd like to thank the people of my grandparents' generation for their bravery and tenaciousness, specifically during WWII. I have to wonder if people nowadays would be willing to make the same sacrifices. Sadly, I doubt it. But at the risk of sounding preachy, I'll leave you with 3 simple words to ponder on the above subject.

Freedom isn't free. Think about it.

Patsy Stone out.

Desperately Seeking "Gnomes"

2006-10-16T22:25:00.000-06:00

Hey Gnomes -- thanks for your comments awhile back. Where are you? Email me so we can reconnect. I'll be up in Edmonton in a few weeks. We should meet up for a Pimms. :)

Like a (Dior) Cowboy...followed by a polemic on "progressive" politics

2006-10-16T20:30:00.000-06:00

A great time was had by all this past Saturday night, as Patsy, her lawyer, and 2 engineer pals went a little bit country at Ranchmans (www.ranchmans.com) on Macleod Trail. It's not called Canada's best honky tonk for nothing - even though they did play Justin Timberlake, Nelly Furtado and the Pussycat Dolls much to Kelly's dismay - we had a blast dancing on stage. The night was capped off by deliciously greasy diner food at Gerry's, or Husky House, to those who have frequented Cowtown longer than the past few months. By the end of the night, I managed to remove my cowboy boots and crawl into bed just shortly after 4:00 a.m. (Julia -- that's why I didn't make it to the phone when you called at 8:45!)

New topic. I surf numerous blogs on a daily basis, and I see a lot of bloggers (http://calgarygrit.blogspot.com as an example - a good read, BTW) proudly display the "progressive blogger" (www.progressivebloggers.ca) logo. Interesting notion, but I can't help but wonder, who decides what "progressive" means? The NDP? Greenpeace? The Canadian Auto Workers Union? What I have a problem with is that, increasingly, if you don't agree with Politically Correct Tenet X, Y and Z, you're automatically declared some kind of a retrograde neanderthal.

Now I'm a socially liberal gal (pro gay marriage, pro choice, and a card carrying Third Wave feminist), but I also tend to be quite hawkish on foreign policy, probably by virtue of the fact that I steadfastly refuse to jump on the anti-Israel and anti-American bandwagon that passes for political thought in Canada these days. This brings me to the question; do my diversity of opinions on various topics make me progressive, or regressive? Do certain opinions trump others on the scale of what is progressive and what is not?

At the end of the day, I cannot completely tow the "progressive" party line because I don't think it's always possible for people to divide neatly into intellectual categories. Bottom line, I get peeved when mob majority rule -- be it in Fargo, North Dakota, or downtown Toronto -- runs amok to a degree where anyone who doesn't 100% completely tow the party line is shunned and denounced as an idiot. Whatever happened to respecting individual opinion and not labelling people? Are not "regressives" human? Do they not bleed? ;)

Now for a few lighter notes:

2. I'm so excited to see Stephen Frears' new film "The Queen" (www.thequeen-movie.com) and Sofia Coppolla's "Marie Antoinette" (www.marieantoinette-movie.com) Movie reviews to follow.

3. My favourite newspaper columnist by far is the Globe and Mail's Margaret Wente. So imagine my dismay when I read in Antonia Zerbisias' column (http://thestar.blogs.com/azerb/) today about some dude that's started up a "Wente Watch" blog (http://wentewatch.blogspot.com) critiquing her columns and opinions. Now, in keeping with the above, I respect this guy's right to his (wrong) opinion - but damn! - don't be dissin' my Peggy! She says what many of us are (cowardly) afraid to. It's rare that Wente misses a beat. I love her.

4. Speaking of columnists and good web sites, another of my long-time faves is www.salon.com and my fave Salon writer is Rebecca Traister. She writes a great piece today about Hillary Clinton and her place in the current feminist arena. Another one of her classic pieces was a few years back, when she wrote about the class war aspect of celebrity tabloid pop culture when they (swiftly) turned on Britney Spears when she became too "trailer trashy".

That's all for now -- t'was a real mixed bag of goodies tonight. Sleep tight everyone.

Thanksgiving redux

2006-10-11T20:09:00.000-06:00

Well I'm sure you've all been waiting with bated breath to hear about my Thanksgiving long weekend. So fasten your seat belts... it was good. 4 nice days off. Had lots of fantastic food (Indian, steak, turkey with all the trimmings), a few cocktails (OK, about 10), visits with family & friends, etc, etc. Got to see a dear friend's new piece of real estate too, which was fun.

Now on to a few celebrity musings.

1. Angelina Jolie as Mariane Pearl in "A Mighty Heart", now filming in India. Is it OK for a white woman to play a mixed-race woman? You decide. (Although I think that the fact Ms. Pearl herself, who wrote the book on which the movie is based, said she was happy AJ got the role kind of defuses the controversy.)

2. Did Madonna adopt a Malawian baby? Do we really care that she's jumped on the Angelina baby bandwagon? And what do we think about famous, rich and white North American women adopting Third World babies? Altruistic? Publicity stunt? Patsy can't help but tut-tut the commodification of babies.

3. Why does every woman on the planet seem to think that Patrick Dempsey from Grey's Anatomy is some kind of sex god? (See US Weekly's October 9 issue.) He just doesn't do it for me. Now a clean-shaven Johnny Depp, that's hot. (with profuse apologies to Ms. "DUI" Hilton)

Now on to one of my obsessions: magazines. Now, dear reader, I ask you: how many subscriptions is excessive? I subscribe to 5 magazines: US Weekly, Loulou, Atlantic Monthly, Chatelaine and Time. Time and Chatelaine were gift subscriptions, US Weekly I bought myself, the Atlantic was a gift for my special someone, although I read it too, and Loulou I bought with some "frequent buyer" miles. Now, in addition to these, as you know I buy Vogue every month and also regularly read Vanity Fair, W, In Style, Elle and occasionally, if I like the look of the cover, Harper's Bazaar. Does this make me an addict? Does Conde Nast need to throw me an intervention? Nah. I think, like lip glosses and Crave cupcakes, magazines are a definite life necessity.

That's all for tonight. I have to go fold four loads of laundry. Sigh. But, before I go, two quick shoutouts: 1) to V and J on the occasion of their first wedding anniverary. Many more, you two! and 2) Congrats Leona on your new job.

Bookclubbin'

2006-10-03T20:38:00.000-06:00

Book clubs. My colleague and soul sister Julia (http://sophisticatedbohemian.wordpress.com) half-heartedly belongs to one, but suggested that the two of us strike up our own, cross-country, just-the-two-of-us book club. She sent me the first installment, David Bergen's "The Time in Between" to read. I'll need to finish my current book first - Philippa Gregory's "The Constant Princess" - but once I'm done that, I'll pick up Bergen's book.

This leads me to ponder what my return pick to Julia will be. There are so many options. But, eureka, I think I've just decided what to recommend. I've read this book a number of times since I stumbled upon it at the Strathcona County Library about a decade ago - I picked it up because of its great cover, which just proves what publishers know, that covers are important! - British author Jonathan Coe's (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jonathan_Coe) "The Winshaw Legacy, or, What a Carve Up".

Coe is critically acclaimed as one of Britain's best "young" (read: under 40, although now he's probably pushing 45) writers, and I'm a huge fan, mostly because he writes satires about Margaret Thatcher's Britain. (I'll forgive him just this once for critiquing the Iron Lady.) So I guess that settles it, "The Winshaw" is my pick. Now I just have to find my copy and mail it to Julia in Toronto. But I'm going to want it back!

Patsy's Saturday Musings

2006-09-30T14:00:00.000-06:00

Hellooooo dear friends,

What a beautiful Saturday here in Calgary. I got up this morning, got a haircut, did some window shopping, picked up October's Vogue and Elle, grabbed a bite to eat, and stopped off at Starbucks on my way home to relax. Ah, the life.

A few thoughts...

I had the pleasure of attending the Elton John concert last night at the Saddledome. I LOVE Elton John and have since his married-to-a-woman days. He's got 30 amazing years of material to cover, and played all the classics: Bennie and the Jets, Rocket Man, Saturday Night's Alright for Fightin', etc. and didn't disappoint the crowd. You should have heard the cheers when he struck up Crocodile Rock on the piano. Worth every penny. Extra special bonus was the entertainment involved in seeing mid-50 year olds dancing the groove thang in the aisles. As Mastercard says; priceless.

Second, backed by popular demand, my thoughts on Tielinda-gate. (Loosely sung to the tune of Nelly Furtado's "Maneater". Ha ha.) I haven't been Ms. Stronach's biggest fan in the past (see previous posts), and that's unlikely to change, but I also doubt that she was THE reason the Domi marriage failed. Takes two to tango and all that, but I'd offer that instead, she was likely the straw that broke the camel's back, etc, etc. It wasn't, after all, like Belinda was Tie's Camilla PB, or Wallis Simpson. I don't imagine these two are soulmates, savvy?

My rationale for the above is that, when push comes to shove, I just don't think that Tie is quite in Belinda's league, at least not enough to make them serious contenders for coupledom. He's certainly no Bill Clinton, if you know what I mean. What I do think about Belinda, though, is that she brings this stuff on herself. When you live in the public eye, like she does, maybe it's not such a good idea to spend lots of private time with a married man, because someone (read: the media) is bound to find out. When it comes down to it, my view is that Belinda doesn't seem to think that the rules of social decency apply to her. The last thing I'll say on the matter is that, as the old saying goes, what goes around comes around. (Adulterers and the men/women who sleep with them - beware!)

And on that sunny note, I'm off to read a good book, but before I do, I want to give a shout out to my pal (and mentor) Leona Hobbs, who's presenting at a "Wired Women" convention in Toronto in October. To read about it, check out her blog: http://flackadelic.typepad.com/

That's all folks.

Go Watch Ugly Betty

2006-09-28T21:28:00.000-06:00

I'm just 15 minutes in, but I'm thinking that ABC's "Ugly Betty" is going to be my (second) favourite new show. Check it out!

Patsy's Got a Brand New Bag!

2006-09-28T20:47:00.000-06:00

My purse came today! God bless the wonderful people at FedEx... Christmas has come early this year... :)

Wanted: One Pair of Charles and Diana Spitting Image Puppet Slippers

2006-09-26T22:49:00.000-06:00

... just like these. Although normally Patsy wouldn't clothe her feet in anything less than a Manolo or Louboutin, the kitschy side of moi cries out "yes, yes, yes".

Thanks to YouTube for entertaining me this evening with 20 year old sketch clips featuring my beloved royals (and Maggie!) on Spitting Image. No one does comedy like the Brits.

My particular favourite was a sketch involving the Windsors trying to figure out what to name the new baby (either William or Harry) and the Queen Mum suggests either Gilbey (as in Gilbey's Gin) or Johnnie Walker. Freakin' priceless!

Background on Patsy...

2006-09-26T22:42:00.000-06:00

I decided it was high time I post some pictures to this site. I also wanted to provide new readers with some background on my alter ego, Patsy Stone.

Without further ado, a photo of yours truly, and a link, where you can read all about me.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Absolutely_Fabulous

The best damned show on TV...

2006-09-26T19:55:00.000-06:00

Over the past few years I've watched very few "new" shows on the boob tube. Content to watch repeats of Sex and the City, Everybody Loves Raymond, the Golden Girls, and yes, Dallas, on DVD or TBS, I need to do a posting about my favourite "new" show, which isn't really new because I've been watching it on NBC for a year and a half.

The Office, really is the best "new" show on TV and is now starting to finally get the acclaim it deserves. Let it be said that I liked The Office when NBC wasn't even sure they'd renew it for a (full) season two. Of course, the BBC original with Ricky Gervais as David Brent is brilliant in its own way, but so is the American version. And true, it's not often the American version of a sitcom can live up to its British original. Coupling, anyone?

A quick run through of why I love The Office.

1) Steve Carell is a comic genius. No one does deadpan like Steve. I'm just worried he'll leave TV to make more money in movies, a la David Caruso. Remember when David Caruso left NYPD Blue to make millions in Hollywood? ;)

2) Jim and Pam. The best, cutest, loveable-st couple on TV. Jim, played by John Krasinski, is my new TV hunk. So gorgeous. I hear he's up next in a movie with Mandy Moore. Pam, played by Jenna Fischer, is the perfect "girl next door." Love these two.

3) Dwangela. Brangelina-esque nickname for the incredibly creepy, pervy Dwight and his anal accountant love, Angela. I love the sneaky romantic tension between these two. Like a train wreck you just can't avoid looking at.

4) Supporting cast --- every member of the cast has a special loveable quality. Phyllis is one of my special favourites. The actress that plays Angela is very different than her character. I think she has a Myspace page. (As do several other of the actors in the cast, including Jenna Fischer.)

5) The writing is clever, brilliant, laugh out loud, painfully funny.

But, don't take my word for it, watch it on Thursdays at 9:30 p.m. If you've ever worked from a cubicle, endured awful staff meetings and obnoxious, clueless bosses, this is the show for you.

Happy Wedding!

2006-09-22T07:53:00.000-06:00

Patsy just wanted to take this opportunity on a cloudy, rainy, Calgary day to send out an extra special shout out to my good friends April & Mark who are getting married today! In fact, due to the time distance in England, as I type this, they're already Mr & Mrs! Congratulations to you both. The Bonham-Joneses -- that's the best damn name I've ever heard of -- and you know I'm an extra special fan of the double barrelled last name! (Sure beats Parker Bowles... :)

Mazel tov!

Raindrops on roses ...

2006-09-12T20:04:00.000-06:00

... and whiskers on kittens, snowbells and sleighbells -- I almost spelled that "slaybells"! -- and schnitzel with... OK, you get the drift. No more Julie Andrews needed. This blog will be about my favourite things. (And yes, I realize how superficial this post is compared with the gravity and sombre tone of yesterday's.) But I digress.

I work in public relations, and a lot of the work we do involves trying to get positive media coverage for our clients. Since it's 2006, and "media" is a much broader concept than it used to be, "positive media coverage" now encompasses blogs. In the interests of full disclosure, I'll say straight up that none of the items on my "favourite things" list include companies or products I'm paid to endorse! So, without further a do... drumroll please.

Patsy Stone's Favourite Things...

1. Crave Cupcakes (www.cravecookies.com). There is nothing I want more right now than a Crave Cupcake. Go right now. Run, don't walk, to the Kensington area of Calgary and buy yourself six cupcakes. I recommend one a night, starting with the Crave-o-licious and followed by the Va-Va-Vanilla. Sweetness. The other thing I love about Crave Cupcakes, besides the obvious, is that the company was started and is run by three sisters from small town Alberta. Great business success story!

2. Vogue magazine (www.vogue.com). I'd get a subscription, but it's really no cheaper, so I buy Vogue every month at the closest book or drug store. Why do I love Vogue? It's so pretentious, glamorous, chock-full-o-ads for thousand dollar shoes and six thousand dollar suits for "the working girl." (Funny they don't say what kind of working girl! :)

The best part of Vogue is that all of the writers seem to have mothers or grandmothers with vintage Lanvin or Chanel haute couture dresses hanging, perfectly kept, in their closets. Really. How many grandmothers do you know, at least the ones I know, that grew up in farm town Alberta, or Saskatchewan, are hiding designer gowns in the closet beside their square dancing outfits? One? Two? I didn't think so.

The second best part of Vogue are the columns by Anna Wintour and ALT, or Andre Leon Talley, for all of you Vogue neophytes. I feel like ALT's an old friend, or at least a comfy pair of (designer) slippers. And no one, I mean no one, not even Karl Lagerfeld, tops Nuclear Wintour. Well, maybe Coco herself.

The third best part of Vogue is Marina Rust, my favourite Vogue writer. I don't really know what she does, besides write about her grandmother's summer house on the coast in Maine, and I assume she's married to a Manhattan investment banker, but her life seems pretty damned good to me. By now it's probably evident that my dream job is to write for Vogue.

3. Gossip websites. Yes, celebrity worship is lowbrow and pathetic, but I enjoy it nonetheless. My favourites: www.laineygossip.com (love her 'cause she's Canadian!), www.jossip.com, http://socialitelife.com, http://trent.blogspot.com (aka: Pink is the New Blog), etc. I surf 'em every day, without fail.

4. Lip gloss. Handbags. This season's shiny patent leather Gucci platform stilettos. Say no more.

5. Coca-Cola. How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. (Although due to the astronomically high sugar levels, I tend to choose Diet Dr. Pepper and the new Diet Black Cherry Vanilla Coke.)

6. Starbucks Venti Cafe Mocha, skim milk, no whip (I'm sure this is still calorie laden, but since I order it skim and no whip, I somehow justify it.)

7. Opa! Souvlaki (TD Square Calgary) for lunch. Mmmm....

8. Fire on the East Side restaurant (midtown Toronto). Thanks to my favourite bride-to-be April in Man-ches-tah for that recommendation and to Julia for the numerous fun nights shared. Bring on the bacon, salsa and feta!

9. Posh and Becks. 'Nuff said.

10. Kate Middleton. I think she'll make a damn good princess.

11. TV shows: Dallas -- best damn guilty pleasure from the 80s. I don't have a flag of Texas in my office for nothing. I would have made a much better Sue Ellen, minus the tremendous drinking problem and tendency to be a doormat.

Footballers Wives -- best damn guilty pleasure from the early 00s. Tanya Turner is my hero, and yes Jason, you do get better looking every day, you misogynist, yet irresistible, dream man.

The Office (both UK and US versions. Go Jim & Pam! Dwangela Forever!) -- best damn TV comedy in a long time.

How I Met Your Mother -- clever, and promising. Me likey.

Sopranos - god only knows why I've had sex dreams about Tony Soprano, but my best guess is the old standby, money and power!

12. Libations: Rye 'n diet. Long island iced teas. Flavoured vodka.

13. Gawdy big diamonds. (a girl's best friend)

14. Fantastic friends, near and far. I love you gals!

15. London, England. There is no other place. Get the cot ready Dr. Alexander, I'm a comin'!

16. Lawyers. (That means you Jilly. And MWR, in a few months.)

17. Engineers. (because they're big drinkers. HH, KM, that's where you both come in.)

18. Sleeping in. My happy place.

Well, I think that's it for now. That alarm comes early.

We Remember

2006-09-11T20:22:00.000-06:00

In memory of the 2,752 fathers, mothers, husbands, wives, sisters and brothers killed this day five years ago. We will not forget.

Will the sun rise tomorrow?

2006-01-23T21:06:00.000-07:00

Well folks - any bets on whether or not the sun rises tomorrow?
Manatee, Gnomes -- I want to hear from you!

Love
Pats

Patsy's Election Musings

2005-12-09T19:56:00.000-07:00

Well fellow political nerds, week two of the campaign is over. The overarching thought I've had these past few days is the sense that I'm living in some sort of parallel universe. Liberals endorsing tax cuts? Jack Layton backing down on private health care? A Conservative policy on child care? What kind of crazy world are we living in? But, I digress. Here are a few hi-lights/lo-lights...

1) Lo-light: Martin's idea to ban handguns. But wait, you ask, aren't handguns basically banned already? Lame-O idea Paul. The fatal flaw in this idea is that the Fiddy-wannabes in Toronto and Vancouver killing each other are not using legal guns anyways. Duh. You think every gangsta in TO is going to turn over his/her gun and start using hand-to-hand combat? Doubtful.

2) Hi-light: the NDP's new "give Liberals the boot" ad. I love cheeky Jack!

3) Lo-light: Paul Martin pandering to American haters at the climate change conference. What a bloody embarassment this guy is. Obviously Dubya couldn't give a rat's ass about the environment, but that doesn't mean that Paul shouldn't check his facts before spouting off at how poor the Americans' environmental record is. Had he checked those numbers, he would have realized that Canada's record on greenhouse gases is actually WORSE than that of the Americans.

4) Hi-light: The Jean Lapierre/Gilles Duceppe feud over those "Liberals disappearing in Quebec"/"that sounds like something out of Nazi Germany" comments. Way to equate the trouble the Libs have gotten themselves into in Quebec with the Third Reich. Quelle bonne idée! (What was he thinking?)

5) Lo-light: Buzz Hargrove selling out the CAW to the highest bidder. What a disgrace. Who wants to wager a little Xmas money that good 'ol Buzz ends up in the Senate?

I think I'm running out of hi-lights... regardless, I look forward to next week's debate. Blog on!

Patsy's Proust Questionnaire

2005-09-24T15:50:00.000-06:00

Since Vanity Fair stooped to put heirhead Paris Hilton on its October cover, I decided that I was worthy enough to post my own answers to VF's Proust Questionnaire on this very blog. Since September's P.Q. designate was fashion god Karl Lagerfeld, I'm, naturally, in very good company.

Warning note: if you're looking for "world peace" type answers, look elsewhere. This is purely for selfish, shallow fun.

1) What is your idea of perfect happiness?
- Being trapped inside Holt Renfrew with a platinum AMEX card I don't have to pay for. (I would, of course, be a size 8 -- considering my body shape and proclivity for fast food, anything else would be just greedy.)

2) What is your greatest fear?
-Camilla Parker Bowles being crowned queen. Failing that, being trapped in a loveless marriage would be pretty bad too.

3) What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
-Weakness. (backing down when I should confront someone, for example. Being nice just to be polite, when the person doesn't deserve niceties, is another.)

4) What is the trait you most deplore in others?
-Laziness.
-Lack of passion (is that a trait? Regardless, it's extremely boring.)

5) What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
-Being able to forgive. (somethings just aren't worthy of it)

6) On what occasion do you lie?
-To spare someone's feelings.

7) What do you dislike most about your appearance?
-Those excess pounds that make it hard to find those dream jeans on eBay.

8) What is your greatest regret?
-I don't have one, thankfully. Ask me again when I'm 90.

9) What or who is the greatest love of your life?
-This is one question that cannot be answered until one's death bed. And anyone who says otherwise is just being trite.

10) What is your current state of mind?
-Full of lust for unimportant things. But, on the whole, excited and happy to be alive.

11) What do you consider your greatest achievement?
-Having the courage to dream and go after something more.

12) What is your most treasured possession?
-At present, my Coach handbag. (but only because husband, friends and family don't count as possessions.)

13) What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
-Living without love. If the poorest of the poor still have love in their lives, they are richer than those without.

14) Where would you like to live?
-London.

15) What is your favourite occupation?
-Reading Vogue while curled up in bed. Napping on Sunday afternoons.

16) What do you most value in your friends?
-Wit, intelligence, loyalty.

17) Who are your favourite writers?
-Austen, Bronte, Margaret Wente, Jonathan Coe.

18) Who is your favourite hero of fiction?
-Scarlett O'Hara.

19) Who are your heroes in real life?
-I've learned that it's best not to place people on pedestals.

20) What are your favourite names?
-Catherine, Alexandra, Diana, Antonia...

21) What is it that you most dislike?
-Rich kids that have never worked an honest day in their lives.

22) How would you like to die?
-Peacefully in my sleep, surrounded by family and friends.

Patsy Stone discovers eBay

2005-09-24T15:30:00.000-06:00

Well a good Saturday afternoon to all of you out there in bloggerland. I've come out of self-imposed exile (read: laziness) to blog about my new obsession: eBay.

My coworker describes eBaying like crack, and let me tell you, I'm inclined to agree with her 100%. First there was the Chanel bag she bought on eBay, and then the Chanel double C earrings, and now the Rock 'n Republic jeans that have faithfully arrived via Canada Post in all their loveliness.

Long story short, I'm now addicted to checking eBay once a day (okay, more like four or five times) to see if my perfect pair of R & R's have been put up for sale yet. I'm dyingggggg for a pair, and considering the 340 dollar ones I tried on last week are a "tad" out of my price range, I'm waiting for them (or a similar version) to appear on eBay.

In closing, if anyone has a pair of size 32 crystal-embossed Rocks, NWT (new with tags) hanging in their closet and are regretting the purchase, sell them to me for cheap, I beg of you!

It's about CHARACTER, stupid!

2005-05-18T19:16:00.000-06:00

One last post for the night... I couldn't resist.

A CBC story on whether or not gender is playing a role in the fallout over Belindagate had me wanting to, yet again, hurl a rock through my television screen. Susan Ormiston finished off her piece by asking if the angry fallout is just another example of unruly women "being put in their place." (ie: women shouldn't be in politics in the first place, so if they step out of line just once -- a la defecting -- their punishment should be banishment to the proverbial kitchen)

My own two cents to Susan and the CBC: people are pissed off because Belinda sold her party down the river 2 days before they needed her loyalty and support more than ever before - and for a Cabinet post, no less. Where's the honour there?

I'm a woman, and let me tell you, this debacle has NOTHING to do with gender and everything to do with character. I've been just as hard on Belinda over the past day as I was two years ago with Scott Brison.

And finally, as for Peter MacKay -- I hope to see him come out swinging tomorrow! Ottawa's most eligible bachelor is unlikely to be single for long!

Patsy's Belinda diatribe - day two

2005-05-18T17:21:00.000-06:00

Thank you, so much, Anne McLellan/Judy Sgro/Sarmite Bulte for standing up for Belinda Stronach in her time of need. I mean, honestly, she was just following her conscience - right? Why won't the mean old Conservatives just leave her alone?? (dripping sarcasm intended)

Full disclosure right off the bat here - the "whore" comments I read on a lot of blogs last night about Belinda were unacceptable: typical sexist, knee-jerk reactions -- but let's not read too much into them. And please, for the love of God, would the Liberal Party please SPARE ME any more grandstanding by blaming the scary Conservatives for the reaction of some dumbass, retrograde, idiot male bloggers? (Some of the "whore" and "dipstick" comments came from PROVINCIAL MLA/MPPs, not federal ones.) Haven't y'all won enough points over this defection? This fearmongering is getting to be a tad much. (Problem is, nervous Ontario voters - god bless 'em - lap it up, so the Libs keep doing it.)

Let's be truly honest here - didn't Belinda sell something to the Liberal Party yesterday? I'll say she did! Not her body, mind you, but she did sell her budget vote to a take-no-prisoners, no-holds-barred, Machiavellian party. Keep in mind that the Liberal tactics just echo the end justifies the means. Isn't that what's truly scary? Let's remember that Stephen Harper wants to decentralize the federal government's power -- he wants to GIVE AWAY some of the PM's power, not horde it.

But, I digress. Let's not be fooled by the Liberals' fuzzy warm exterior - these people will STOP AT NOTHING to hold on to power. Do Ms. McLellan and her colleagues (who are well-educated, professional women) really NOT MIND that Belinda swept in with her billions and took a Cabinet seat away from someone that has likely put in YEARS as a backbencher?

What about Martha Hall Findlay, who was asked to step aside her Liberal candidacy in the Newmarket-Aurora riding so Belinda could take over - is this whole escapade fair to her? Take a look at her resume, for crying out loud - very impressive!

So Anne, Judy, Sarmite - I'm an educated, professional woman who is pro-choice and pro-gay marriage - I'm no SoCon - but I'm also not afraid of the big, bad Tories. I'm not afraid to think for myself AND be angry with a government that has regularly stolen money from the ever-faithful Canadian taxpayer. As intelligent women, I have to ask how you all can keep towing the party line and doing the bidding for a party that shows disrespect for the tax dollars of many hard-working Canadian women. What's the rationale there?

I'm asking the Liberal women to stop doing the bidding for a corrupt government, which, as we speak, is earning increasing brownie points by cashing in on your over-the-top, righteous anger.

As a voter, and as a woman, let me say that I take offence at the Liberal Party SELLING CABINET SEATS TO THE HIGHEST BIDDER. So please spare me the rhetoric and the feigned outrage - Belinda voted to take you all down last week and now you're all welcoming her with open arms? You call her selling out her party for a Cabinet post (she's not even qualified for!) GUTSY?

I encourage my fellow women to read Margaret Wente, Chantal Hébert, Christie Blatchford - see what they have to say on the issue. See what they have to say about the systemic corruption within the Liberal party. See what they have to say about a governing party that passed out envelopes stuffed with cash to their friends and associates - with YOUR money. I also ask my fellow women to think about how they are being blackmailed by the Liberals (the budget promises) WITH THEIR OWN MONEY. The Liberals aren't handing out money for cities, money for health care, money for childcare to be nice! They're handing out your hard-earned tax dollars to win your vote! Let's not fall for it!

OK -rant concluded. I need to go take my heart medication now because I can't take much more of this!

Traitor, thy name is Belinda!

2005-05-17T20:46:00.000-06:00

Your beloved Patsy is still foaming at the mouth, 12 long hours after hearing of "The Honourable Belinda Stronach, M.P."'s defection from the Tories to the Liberals. I must conclude that loyalty is not something taught or valued at Magna Corp.

Belinda could have easily retained her "principles" (and her class) by choosing to serve out the remainder of her term as an Independent MP. Instead, she chose to sell her crucial vote to a corrupt, despotic government only a mother could love.

Does she really expect us to believe that her new Cabinet position is just a "welcome to the neighbourhood" gift from Martin and Co.? Wasn't it only yesterday that our beleaguered prime minister called for a return to dignity in the House of Commons? Easy for him to say when he knew that (most likely) his numbers were safe for Thursday's vote!

It's plain to see that I'm bitter this DELICIOUS political coup went to the Liberals. After all, they're going to get away with the sponsorship scandal -- isn't that prize enough?? Did they really have to steal our auto parts heiress? Let me be the first to call for a Desmarais in return! Perhaps Ms. Chretien-Demarais would like to be the new Opposition Critic for International Trade? Justin Trudeau as Opposition Critic for Health?

All I'm asking for is to see those smug Liberal bastards go down in scorching defeat just once before I die! Is that really too much to ask?

Patsy's Ramblings on the Royal Wedding

2005-04-09T19:27:00.000-06:00

Just having returned from my day in Windsor attending the marriage of Prince Charles and Camilla PB I thought it appropriate to sit down and pen some thoughts on the day. Here goes.

Brief thoughts on the royal wedding/guests:

Prince William - please do something with your hair!
Prince Harry - looking good, kid! (and better choice of costume than the last time!)
Zara Phillips, daughter of Princess Anne, looked, dare I say it, absolutely fabulous in a brightly-coloured Pucci dress.
Hats, hats, hats. Philip Treacy, you're a genius!
Really liked Camilla's second outfit - the longer blue/grey coatdress with gold embroidering -- very classy
Camilla's daughter, Laura Parker Bowles, looked very lovely in her dress. I can imagine that it must be pretty nervewracking to see your mother marry the future King of England!
Fergie and Andrew's daughters, Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie looked very grown-up in their Prada dresses
Sophie, Countess of Wessex, looked as chic as ever. (I wonder why little Lady Louise didn't make an appearance? I guess someone had to stay behind and guard Windsor Castle!)

Thoughts on the marriage itself:

All in all, it was a bittersweet day (maybe 60% sweet, 40% bitter). Although I think one would have to be completely heartless to deny Charles & Camilla the right to be together - I still can't quite get over the utter callousness in which Charles (at times) treated Diana throughout their marriage.

I couldn't help feel a bit of residual bitterness at the religious blessing during the "forsaking all others" bit. Should we really trust the words of a confessed adulterer? Did Charles fully intend to forsake all others when he pledged to love and honour Diana all those years ago? Or was he lying to himself, Diana, and the whole world then, but today, in 2005, we're supposed to believe that he is telling the truth? (And no, I don't seriously think Charles would cheat on Camilla, but the point is that he most likely blatantly lied during his first wedding vows to Diana, which kind of rubs me the wrong way. Should you really be lying to God - and your future wife - in church, of all places?)

It is perhaps a cruel twist of fate that Charles didn't marry Camilla in the early 1970s, an event that may have spared a whole lot of people a whole lot of misery, but regardless, should he have agreed to marry a woman he didn't really love in the first place? And can we really place the blame at the feet of the Queen and Prince Philip for "bullying" their eldest son into marrying the 20-year-old Diana? Charles was a 32-year-old man at the time of his marriage - he couldn't have stood up for himself and refused to marry until he was sure he had found a compatible partner?

In short - Charles' track record of adultery (albeit with one woman, Camilla) - makes his vows today to "forsake all others" just slightly haunting. But I guess in today's world, where the pursuit of personal happiness often comes at the expense of others, it should come as no surprise that so many are willing to forgive, forget, condone.

At this point I should qualify that I do hope Charles & Camilla live happily ever after. It's obvious that they are each others' soulmates, the loves of each others' lives. I find it so heartwarming, for lack of a better word, to see a couple that, after 30 years, are as much in love with each other as they were at the beginning of their relationship. It's a romantic notion in this day and age where people get married with little regard and respect for the seriousness of the institution (Britney, Nicky-- this means YOU) that love can stand the test of time. My only wish is that Charles and Camilla had married each other 30 years ago, thus sparing a vulnerable Diana many years of misery. But, continuing on...

England has a new Princess of Wales today. (English women automatically take all of their husband's titles.) The cynical side of me can't help but wonder if today is the culmination of Camilla's deepest, darkest desires - to supplant Diana as Charles' wife, to become stepmother to Diana's children, to adopt the royal titles that Diana was stripped of in her divorce. The title of a recent CBC documentary was "Princess Camilla: Winner Takes All"; a cruel, albeit factual statement. This leads me to wonder: has Camilla "won" after all? I can't help but answer yes. The obvious next question: did Camilla actively and calculatingly pursue Charles in the hopes of one day taking him for herself? I don't know. Friends of Mrs. PB have always said that Camilla never wanted to be royal, but would it really be so horrible to be called "Your royal highness" and be curtsied to by every woman in the country except the Queen? Would it really be so horrible to live in the lap of luxury as a royal duchess? Would it really be so horrible to wear gorgeous heirloom jewellery and live in a castle? I think not.

On the other hand, the "people are inherently good" side of myself can't help but smile and get all "verklempt" and choked up at the sight of two old coots on their wedding day. Camilla did look beautiful and I hope her future path in life is a little less twisty-turny than it has been up until now. She certainly has put up with her share of misery in this whole debacle. (I'm thinking particularly about the infamous bread-roll throwing incident at a Gloucestershire grocery store in the early 1990s.) Although perhaps Camilla did deserve a bit of what she got, for knowingly committing adultery with another woman's husband -- the ultimate low-down-dirty-trick in my "sisterhood" book -- she certainly has withstood a lot of scrutiny for the love of her prince. I just hope he turns out to be worth all the trouble!

Anyways - I think that's about all I have to say on this subject. It was, I suppose, a pretty good day - I got to do a lot of royal-watching, saw a lot of haute couture, elbowed that obnoxious Tara PT out of the way in the drink-ticket line! (I stand by my opinion that Tara really would be better off in America where other such utterly talentless twits reside -- Paris H., Kevin F., this means YOU.) The Brits do know how to throw a party - no one does pomp and circumstance better, which is probably why I love England so much!

Signing off for now, your ever-faithful Windsor-watcher,

Patsy S.

Patsy Stone Debatin'

2004-09-30T20:06:00.000-06:00

Well folks... the mother of all elections is only a few short weeks away...you guessed it right, the Bush vs. Kerry showdown. Wannabe pundits, start your engines! Debate #1 starts tonight!

Mammalicious!!

2004-09-30T14:51:00.000-06:00

I finally had the chance, last night, to see the "smash hit" Mamma Mia! I just had to post what a FABULOUS experience it was and that this confirms what I've known since the age of about four (when I would groove to "Dancing Queen" in my parents living room singing at the top of my little lungs), that ABBA is the best pop group of all time! Period. Full stop. If you really don't get your groove on at the very sounds of "Voulez-Vous", "Money Money Money" and "Waterloo", you're just not human! Seriously. Period. Full stop. Now I'm going to drop everything and dash to the nearest retro dance party (my living room). In closing, thank you Abba, for the music! (and kudos to the awesome, marvelous, T.O. Mamma Mia cast!)

Sexual Politics and The Apprentice 2

2004-09-30T14:15:00.000-06:00

Okay. The Apprentice 2: women versus men. Patsy's a card-carrying feminist who admires strong women. Naturally, I should be rooting for the women, right? Wrong... Every week, I find myself cheering for the guys (plus Pamela) over the gals. Why? Simple. I'm sick of the immature bitchiness, cattiness, backbiting and scapegoating!

To assuage such existentialist hankering deep within my psyche (phew!), I started wondering about what makes these women act the way they do. The feminist-cum-sociologist in me explains this by arguing that, even in 2004, the business world is still predominantly male-driven, and thus, to compete for the few spots available to women, gals just have to duke it out with each other for that elusive spot. This brings me to wonder, a la Carrie Bradshaw: which came first, the chicken or the egg?

Are these women bitchy just because they're bitches (a word I normally NEVER use to describe women-because, as we know, bitches are just decisive, intelligent, ambitious men in Ally McBeal-length skirts) OR, are they bitches by necessity, "victims" (boy, am I treading on a minefield here!) of our male-driven society? Hmmm...

What I really hate about reality TV is the backbiting and childish behaviour that seems to infest the women (and the men too!) on shows like the Apprentice and the Bachelor. Now granted, I know this is TV land and that the gorgeous woman-drama queen-sex combo is ratings dynamite (I AM watching, aren't I??), but I'm so frustrated that in 2004 this kind of bullshit still goes on!

Whatever happened to sisterhood? Whatever happened to being professional and business like? Women, including those on TV reality shows, should realize that, by sticking together, backing each other up, being respectful and understanding to each other, the whole team, and womenkind, wins!

Why have the guys (plus Pamela) on The Apprentice 2 won the past two weeks in a row? Maybe because they're not wasting time stabbing each other in the back and bickering like toddlers! So, in conclusion, until the ladies of the Apprentice start acting like the intelligent, ambitious, talented women they (presumably) are, I'm going to be rooting for the boys.

Go. To. Halifax. Now.

2004-09-08T16:16:00.000-06:00

A mere 36 hours after returning to Toronto from a four month work term back home in Alberta, yours truly set out for an adventure in Nova Scotia, aptly named "Canada's Ocean Playground." Well folks, the verdict is in, and Nova Scotia is AWESOME. If you love the ocean and/or late Victorian architecture, drop everything and go. Right. Now.

My journey began when I left Toronto very early on Friday morning, September 3, arriving in downtown Halifax around 12:30. Met by Alex, my dear friend Em's significant other, I walked along the beautiful boardwalk, taking in the salty ocean air and gorgeous harbourfront. (Note to Toronto city planners!)

I spent the afternoon touring the Maritime Museum of the Atlantic (the Titanic and Halifax Explosion exhibits were particularly good) and went on a land and boat tour of downtown Halifax/the harbour. (Highly recommend the boisterous tour guides at the "Harbour Hopper." Ribbit. Ribbit. -- inside joke--)

Met up with Em around 9:00 p.m. and headed out on the town for some pub and martini bar-style fun.

Saturday dawned bright and early for me around 12:30 p.m. (HA!) Since it was an overcast day, Em and I were happy to hop in the car and drive down to her parents' new cottage, near the scenic and quaint La Have Islands. Had a low-key afternoon and enjoyed a delicious dinner with her parents, followed by a nice evening walk along the boardwalk and beach.

Sunday was touring day, and luckily the weather was beautiful. We set off around 10:30 a.m. to visit Lunenburg, Mahone Bay and Peggy's Cove. I really enjoyed the neat shops in Lunenburg. We stopped along the highway at a very fitting tribute to the victims of the Swiss Air crash that went down off the coast of Peggy's Cove. Very solemn. Patsy may have teared up a tiny bit. Peggy's Cove was swarming with tourists, so we got in and out as quickly as possible. Sunday night meant a dinner out (seafood chowder pour moi) and then a quick trip to Casino Nova Scotia. (Man, are slot machines ever addictive! But don't worry, Patsy broke even! Emily, on the other hand, won a fair chunk of change!!)

Holiday Monday was another lovely day spent walking through the Halifax Public Gardens, visiting the Citadel (never attacked!) and going on a tour of the Alexander Keith's brewery! Enjoyed a fancy dinner out, pricey price tag included, and then had an absolutely sinful dessert and martini at the Shoe Shop.

Tuesday Em had to go back to work, so I toured some more around downtown Halifax, bought some souvenirs (stuffed lobster in a rain slicker, anyone?), had lunch overlooking the water, etc. My last touristy-thing was taking in Pier 21, where many many immigrants to Canada (including my parents' neighbour back in Alberta!) entered the country to start off their new lives as Canadians, and soldiers/sailors (my grandfather included) left on transport ships and convoys to fight WWII in Europe.

I was sad to leave Halifax on Tuesday night to head back to TO, but excited to see my hubby. Thanks to Em and Alex for a wonderful four days. Falling in love with Nova Scotia is very easy to do and I can't wait to go back! :)

(Side note: about 10 days ago back in AB, some f*****g punks smashed the windshield of my mom's minivan. Message to said punks: grow up, you bloody losers! Destroying personal or public property for kicks is NOT cool.)

Without further ado, I have to head off and watch Canada beat Slovakia in World Cup hockey. Cheers, sweeties.

Carolyn Parrish Strikes Again!

2004-08-25T16:00:00.000-06:00

Well, well, well. It had to happen sooner or later. Renegade tongue-lasher Carolyn "Open Mouth, Insert Foot" Parrish, MP for Mississauga-Erindale, has struck again, referring to the U.S. missile defence system as being made up of a "coalition of idiots." Regardless of your opinion on Star Wars/MAD-type weaponry, Parrish is always good for a snicker! It's too bad she'll never make Cabinet and be able to embarrass herself on the international stage. Oh no... wait! She's already done that!

Ter-EH-sa rocks!

2004-07-29T15:12:00.000-06:00

After a lengthy absence, your ever-loving Patsy Stone has seen fit to blog again. My "raison d'etre" for coming out of semi-retirement is simple: one Teresa Heinz Kerry.

Ms. Heinz Kerry is, in my humble opinion, the most wondrous breath of fresh air to come out of stuffy Washington, D.C. in A LONG time. I think Teresa rocks! She's smart, funny, witty, elegant, etc., etc., etc. I think she'd make a fantabulous first lady.

It's a pity that the media can't wait to jump on the slightest hint of her being anything less than a Stepford wife. So she said "shove it", albeit in what I thought was an incredibly polite way, to an annoying reporter. Big freakin' deal. "Shove it"????? Geez, how crude. Surely much more inappropriate than when Dick Cheney told Sen. Patrick Leahy of Virginia to fuck off in the House of Representatives a few months ago!

I like that Teresa H.K. speaks her mind and doesn't put up with any crap, although I guess that when you're worth close to a billion dollars you don't have to make nice when you don't want to. I appreciate that THK is worldly, independent, manages a multimillion dollar philanthropic organization, among other things. Is there anything she can't do??

Although I think John Kerry's protectionist economic policies, at least in regards to the agriculture industry, (see SIDE NOTE 1) spell bad news for Canada, I can't help but hope he gets elected in November. If only so we get 4 more years of Teresa.

I for one can't wait to hear what she says next!

(SIDE NOTE 1: Kerry, Teddy "Remember Chappaquiddick" Kennedy and Hillary R.C. signed their names to a document asking President Bush to keep the U.S. border closed to Canadian beef for, get this, FOOD SAFETY REASONS. Food safety. Sure.)

(SIDE NOTE 2: www.bushvchoice.com/trailer/home.html is worth checking out! Although I don't necessarily like the mean-spiritedness of the trailer and corresponding poster, I appreciated the cleverness nonetheless. That, and Ann Coulter is insane!)

Take a spoonful of sugar...

2004-07-02T15:54:00.000-06:00

I've been informed by someone who shall remain nameless that my last post, "Patsy's Election Postscript; or, "Screw us: we're Canadian"! was a tad too bitter.

My remedy for that would be to consume something really sugary while reading the post so as to counteract my bitter prose.

Bonne fin de semaine tout le monde!

Love, Pats

Patsy's Election Postscript; or, "Screw us: we're Canadian!"

2004-07-02T10:34:00.000-06:00

Well surprise, surprise.
Another Liberal government.
Who WOULD have thought?

Try to excuse the sarcasm dripping from my disaffected, disenchanted, alienated Western self. But seriously, did I really think that Canadians would have the balls to reject their corrupt government? Not for a split second. Two reasons. One, I'm a cynic. 'Nuff said. Two, I know all too well the mindset of the average (urban)Ontario voter. (They really can't help themselves, you know. But I'm trying to love them anyways because technically I am one.)

That being said, I ask you, dear reader, who WOULDN'T rally around the banner of a tired, arrogant, and fraudulent Liberal party? Heaven forbid something would ever change in this country! I'm not asking for drastic change, mind you, (I like democracy, freedom of expression, health care, education, roads...)but a rejection of a government that has, for too many years, taken serious advantage of unsuspecting Canadians.

With such a forgiving electorate, how did Brian Mulroney's Conservatives ever get trounced so easily? Remember the hullaballoo surrounding the GST? How's that for proof that Canadians CAN get mad, and get even? Jean Chretien ably (gasp! did I just compliment JC?)harnessed the anger of Canadians and translated it into a landslide majority victory. And from then on, the Libs had a firm grip on the Canadian political scene. Not because they had great ideas, but because people were mad-as-hell-and-weren't-going-to-take-it-anymore. Phew. Remember too that Chretien got elected on a promise to scrap the GST. Hmmm.... I guess it was all downhill from there.

Rounding that corner, I think it's high time that I address this whole western alienation concept. What a quaint notion. If you ask me, the West should start taking advice from Quebec, a province that has skillfully managed to hover separation over the heads of the federal government for as long as I can remember. I challenge you, dear reader, to remember a time when the feds WEREN'T scared stiff of les Quebecois. Granted, the Quebec population is at least 3 times that of Alberta's. Granted, the francophone history of Quebec goes back to Samuel de Champlain and should rightly be protected in our country's constitution. What I find so amusing, however, is that, for the above reasons, among others, when Quebec says "jump", the feds undoubtedly ask "how high."

What some Westerners find so frustrating is that the feds continue to, at best, belittle and demonize, and, at worst, ignore, most of Western Canada because they're so concerned with who really matters: Ontario and Quebec. I also don't really believe Paul Martin when he talks about trying to stem the tide of "western alienation." If he was really concerned with taking the West seriously, and treating the West with respect, would he have resorted to scare tactics and fear mongering during the election campaign?

Come to think of it, why SHOULD the feds care about the West? They've proven, time and time again, that they don't need the West to win, so why bother? That's what I think is truly at the heart of western alienation. The fact that we are, essentially, completely powerless. Read Chantal Hebert's piece in the Star today, she talks about how Albertans, as an example, put a lot more into confederation (hello: transfer payments!) than they get out.

Think, dear reader, (especially those in the 416 or 905 area codes), how would YOU feel if you were either completely ignored OR made fun of/demonized/patronized (crazy, cranky, red-neck, socially-retrograde Westerners), AND rendered politically limbless. Add to that paying a sizeable chunk of tax to the feds, which is then doled out to those that actually vote Liberal. Wouldn't you, dear reader, be pretty pissed off? This, I hazard to guess, is the reason that so many Westerners are disgusted with this fourth consecutive Liberal government. We can't understand why Ontario would turn a blind eye to the chronic corruption and waste spewed by the Liberals for the past who-knows-how-long.

To top it off, the "who, me?" attitude of so many Liberal witnesses at the public accounts committee truly disgusted many Canadians, from coast to coast. (Think Alfonso Gagliano!) While Paul Martin said he was as mad as hell, numerous others stalled, deliberately evaded questions, fled to Arizona, etc. to avoid taking any responsibility for the sponsorship scandal. What infuriated me the most, however, was the reaction I heard from so many: the "how dare you accuse me of this?"/"how dare you ask me where the money went?" attitude; the idea that NO ONE in the Liberal party should have to account for, perhaps criminal, behaviour.

I firmly believe that these belligerent attitudes are the result of a political environment in Canada that holds no one accountable. Canadians are just so grateful that they live where they live (and rightfully so), that they're willing to ignore/turn a blindeye to being treated with such disrespect. (I might remind Canadians that their taxes pay for this wonderful country, NOT the generosity/benevolence of the Liberals.)

So let's face it: the Liberals can do anything they want in Canada. Anything. Some old dead white guy once said that absolute power corrupts absolutely. Let's just hope that this Liberal minority government learns from their slap on the wrist, and that Paul Martin sincerely works towards reforming the structure of the Liberal party. He has a tremendous opportunity to clean house. Let's hope that he keeps this promise, because if he doesn't...

Oh, wait! Who do I think I'm kidding? Our national motto might as well be: "Screw us, we're Canadian!"

In closing, thanks voters of southern Ontario for four more years of Liberals. I think I'll move to Philadelphia. I'd rather not vote in the States and see political change every few years (President Kerry, anyone?) than continue to vote in Canada and be ignored/treated like a leper because "my Canada" doesn't excuse the misdeeds of the Liberal Party.

I just might take my job skills, husband, charm, devilish good looks and move. Low taxes and high health insurance anyone? Perhaps that's an indication of just how alienated this Westerner is. And don't tell me I'm cutting off my nose to spite my face. Don't tell me I'm being irrational. That's Patsy's prerogative.

Patsy's Predictions

2004-06-28T11:01:00.000-06:00

Okay... after much thought, here are my seat number predictions for today's election.

Libs- 115
Cons- 112
NDP- 20
Bloc- 60
Ind- 1

I think that the Liberals will be able to squeak out a "victory" here. When push comes to shove, in my opinion, Ontario voters just won't be able to make that X for the Conservatives, especially a party with so many roots out in the "crazy West." (at least that's the image the Liberals have been projecting.)

Fantino Out

2004-06-24T17:32:00.000-06:00

Just a quick post here...

I was catching up on the Toronto news, and read that police chief Julian Fantino's contract is not being renewed.

I'd like to defend Fantino if I can. Simply put, the Toronto media never gave Fantino a break. He couldn't do anything right.

I saw him as a no-nonsense, very capable, and caring person. The media backlash over corruption and racism allegations, although very important to investigate and root out, unfairly targeted Fantino. It's not an easy job to dodge verbal and bureaucratic bullets when your officers are getting shot at every weekend and your good work is being ignored.

I guess that sometimes when the going gets tough, the tough get sidelined. In this case, a real shame. From someone who's lived in Toronto for the past few years, I'd like to thank Fantino for his work. Hats off.

To his replacement: better get used to the wrath of the almighty Toronto Star.

Patsy's Picks

2004-06-24T16:58:00.000-06:00

I'm very excited to watch on Monday night, a few close races. Will Landslide Annie be able to pull off a win in Edmonton Centre? That being said, here are a few of my favourites! (and the one that I hope loses)

Some of my Favourites:

1. Jack Layton (Toronto-Danforth)

How can one not like Smilin' Jack, the man who never met a camera he didn't like? Now I know a lot of left-leaning people that can't stand the man, but I must admit having a bit of a soft spot for him. I think that Dennis Mills will have a tough time defending his seat.

2. Olivia Chow (Trinity-Spadina)

Ms. Chow has won the "best city councillor" award in Toronto for 88 years running. (or something like that) I like Olivia, I think she fights hard for the little guy and little gal, and I think that Parliament needs more people like her.

3. Ed Broadbent (Ottawa Centre)

Guess who's back? Ed's back! (The "Ed's Back" video on Broadbent's website is a must see.) I've been a political junkie since I was toddler, and remember Broadbent as leader of the NDP in their glory days. Something like 42 seats. Wow! Needless to say, I'm thrilled that the Tories and NDPs have started to chase the Libs. Good for democracy, I say. Bring on the Greens!

4. Judy Wasylyclia-Leis (Winnipeg-?)

I hope I spelled Judy's name right. I like her. Plus she's a good friend of my friends Chris and Trish. 'Nuff said. Judy always held the Libs feet to the fire in the public accounts committee.

5. Tony Clement (Brampton-?)

Tony the Tiger reminds me of a loveable underdog. That's why I hope he can win his riding. Plus he was good under pressure during the SARS crisis.

6. Jim Prentice (Calgary-North Centre)

I like Jim Prentice. Period. (not having to justify yourself is also one of the beauties of blogging)

Please go aways:

1. Carolyn Parrish (Mississauga-Erindale)

I think Ms. Parrish is utterly obnoxious. Did you really think the mic was turned off Carolyn? Ms. Parrish is the stereotypical holier-than-thou Canadian, standing on the sidelines complaining. (Note: I am NOT calling all Canadians holier-than-thou. But there are a few, like in any country.)Criticizing George Bush: fair game, criticizing the Republican Party: fine, criticizing American foreign policy: okay. But to publicly admit you hate 300 million people? Talk about simple minded. Real classy, Carolyn.

On thorny social issues...

2004-06-24T16:47:00.000-06:00

I'd like to clear up a few things. Over the past month we've been bombarded with "Scary Harper" propaganda. I'd like to point something out, at least in regards to that most contentious of issues, abortion.

First off, I'm wholeheartedly pro-choice. Completely, 100%, etc... I'm also a feminist, and proud of it.

What annoys me, however, is the fear mongering that, in my opinion, (b/c that's the joy of a blog!) has become only slightly ridiculous. The fear mongering that treats Canadians like they can't think for themselves.

To anyone legitimately afraid that the Conservatives, if in power, would try to pass any abortion law, I say this: do the (relatively) simple math.

An abortion law WOULD NEVER PASS in the Canadian House of Commons. NEVER. Why, you ask? Simply put, I'd put money down that the majority of Conservative candidates and MPs are pro-choice. Or at least are too busy cutting taxes to care one way or the other. That being said, the vast majority of Liberal MPs and candidates are pro-choice (except for Tom Wappel, etc...). I also believe, correct me if I'm wrong, that the entire Bloc Quebecois and NDP parties are pro-choice.

So let's add up a few numbers... if anyone out there can explain to me how this current equation would ever add up to an abortion law passing, then let me know. The rest of you... quit worrying! I'm a woman, I have a uterus, and I have no fears whatsoever about abortion legislation passing. (Now the States, that's another matter. The religious right in the U.S. is quite powerful.)

End of story.

Liberal scandals redux

2004-06-24T15:15:00.000-06:00

I have to take a moment to respond to the musings of my esteemed colleague over at the Alberta Propagandists.

While it may be argued that the Liberals were only acting in the best interests of Canada, at least in the sponsorship scandal, I would counter by saying that fraud is still fraud. If the money truly went to try to keep the country together, then okay. (unless you have a problem with trying to buy the affections of les Quebecois)But, from what I can tell, at times cheques were sent to Liberal-friendly ad firms (Groupaction, for one) in exchange for NO WORK. Forged documents and all that...

That is what I have a problem with.

On a lighter note, I too was very sorry to see England go down to defeat at the hands of Portugal.

Bolly to drown our sorrows?

Love, Pats

Musings on Liberal party "ancient history"

2004-06-24T12:21:00.000-06:00

Let's face it. Up until a few months ago, Canadian politics was just about as exciting as watching the weather network. Imagine my surprise then, when the federal election race turned out to be just that... a race. Never in a million years would I have thought that the Conservatives or the NDP would be giving the Fiberals (sorry, can't help myself) a run for their money. (read: our money funnelled through their ad firms)

My husband predicted, Cassandra-like, at least a year ago that Paul Martin was going to seriously disappoint. The "great white hope" of the Liberals, per se, was going to turn out to be just another ho-hum politician. To his credit, the hubby was dead on.

Think back, if you will, to last October or November, the last few months of the Chretien reign. The anticipation in the air of the future crowning (read: not-so-friendly coup) was palatable. You could almost taste it. Riding high on ten years of Chretien rule, the Martinites in the Liberal Party were licking their lips at the thought of finally taking over.

So, what happened? What went so terribly wrong? Simply put, Jean Chretien's final "screw you" to his usurper, was the timing of his "retirement" and the official release of Auditor General Sheila Fraser's report on Adscam.

Now I'm certainly no Paul Martin fan, but to be completely fair, the guy got royally screwed here. Some would argue that he got what he deserved, in that he engineered his predecessor's swan song and his own coronation, but, in my opinion, the scorn and anger of Canadians about the Liberals' intrinsic mis-management of taxpayer funds should be placed firmly at the feet of the lil' guy from Shawinigan. HRDC, inflated costs of the gun registry, adscam, etc... all happened during Chretien's watch.

And, as a sidenote, for all those of you who don't think that the mismanagement of $250 million is that big a deal, I ask: how many hot lunches for inner city kids could that money have purchased, how many more teachers in our schools, etc...? Wasted money is wasted money. Period. Money that could have stayed in taxpayer pockets, gone to shorten hospital waiting lists, etc.

June 28th is our chance not to reward bad behaviour. What kind of message does it send any political party when flagrant disregard for the electorate is rewarded with a fourth term in office?

Now, many people will say that the new Tories are nothing more than wolves in sheep's clothing. But let's not forget that a vote for Team Martin is basically a vote for Team Chretien. New dog, new cabinet, decidedly old tricks.

With that, on June 28th I encourage you to "choose change", in the words of beleaguered Ontario Premier Dalton McGuinty. Whether the Dippers, Tories or Greens are your party of choice, exercise your right to vote on Monday.

Ta ta for now.

With that, pass the Stoli sweetie. While you're at it, maybe a ciggy too.

Love, Pats

Slow to jump on blogging bandwagon

2004-06-24T00:09:00.000-06:00

Look ma! I'm blogging... (better late than never.)

I'm a political junkie. Always have been, always will be. That being said, I'm thrilled to be deep in the middle of a federal election campaign. It's been a good year for political junkies. For the past two years I've been an Alberta expatriate living in Ontario. Over the past few months we've had a Toronto mayoralty election, an Ontario provincial election, and now this Canadian federal election. There's been lots of editorials to read, even more political "attack" ads to critique, plenty to debate. That's why I wanted to jump on the blogging bandwagon. Even if no one reads my blogs, then at least I'll have been able to burn off some steam typing away, as opposed to arguing with anyone who will listen.

I knew that "blogging" was increasing fast in popularity, so I started reading a few blogs that had been recommended to me.

It was, however, my two colleagues, the Alberta Propagandists, who made me decide to start blogging myself.

I'll start fresh with my first official political post sometime tomorrow.

Pass the Stoli, sweetie!

Love, Pats